Caffeine the Wonder Drug

When I see that title, my brain reads it as, “Cocaine the Wonder Drug,” and that right there is my problem.  It’s quite possible I had way too much caffeine yesterday, and my brain is freaking out.

Yesterday I felt a possible migraine coming on after picking the boys up from school.  It could have been a regular headache, but seeing as how the migraines make me want to poke my brain out with Legos, I decided not to take any chances.  I took some medicine and also went for caffeine.  The caffeine I ingested included but is not limited to: a liter of Coke, cookies with chocolate on the back, M&M’s, and Excedrin tension headache pills.  (Caffeine in pill form! I love modern medicine!)

Oh dear, Mommy has a headache. Everyone lay low.

I should have been wary of side-effects seeing as this all started at 3pm, but the headache stayed mild and eventually disappeared, so I was willing to take a little sleeplessness.  What I got was wide-awakeness.  It was not pleasant.

If my bedroom was a TV cartoon, you would have seen total dark pierced by my 2 wide eyeballs shifting back and forth.  (Also? The horrible sound of my sick husband mouth-breathing and coughing up his lungs.)

My heart was racing, and my mind was crafting the world’s best blog posts which I cannot recall because I’m not high anymore.  I heard all the noises our neighbors, who I’ve named the Clompersons, made as they returned from wherever God had sent them the last few days so that I didn’t kill them for their loud walking and annoying baby talk.

When I finally drifted off to sleep, my son Jack decided to add to my suffering by calling for me. Now, my kids are not good sleepers, so this is not an unusual occurrence.  What was unusual was that he ended up in my bed for a while.  I’m not sure how this happened.  He asked me to sit in his room.  I told him it was way too late for that.  He said something about my bed being comfy.  He packed up his lovies like details had been ironed out and a contract signed and held his hands up for me to get him out of his bed.  Next thing I know, I was laying there without a pillow with him on one side and snoring sick man on the other both trying to squeeze me to death.  I eventually carried him back to his bed, but the damage had been done.

Now, I’m one tired lady.  I’ve promised to take the boys to an indoor play place that is notorious for playing Alvin and the Chipmunks covers of pop songs.  How will I ever cope?

Stay away from my kid you no-talent hack!

Heeeeeeyyyy, is that Coke?


4 thoughts on “Caffeine the Wonder Drug

  1. I have been guilty of too much caffeine as well. You have described that jittery feeling to a t. This made me laugh out loud. Thank you for brightening my morning.

  2. Is the world shaking or is it just me? LOL.
    I hear ya. Sometimes we forget that there is hidden caffiene in things that we eat.
    I love caffiene.
    I do not like the chipmunks or as my son calls them “chicken punks”

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